I started this blog for a number of reasons, one of which was to educate my friends about homosexuality. A good number of them have limited knowledge about how gay people are, and most of their perceptions resulted from their limited exposure to our kind. "Gay," for them, refers to guys who act like girls, want to be girls, or dress like girls.
Most of them were shocked when a "straight looking guy" like myself turned out to be gay.
I have been asked a lot of questions by these friends of mine, mostly brought about by their curiosity about my lifestyle. Some of their inquiries were downright disturbing and wrong, and I had to call them out each time. Here are some of the "classic" ones:
 |
| image courtesy of trendandtonic.thefuturescompany.com |
1. Are you the guy or the girl in your relationship?
I laugh like crazy every time I hear this one. If you are a straight guy/girl reading this post, please, please: never ask this question. It makes you look like an ignorant person. That's the thing about a gay relationship: the parties are both guys (or both girls). Sometimes, we take on the "top" or "bottom" roles, but this is not really a requirement. And being a bottom doesn't equate to being a girl.
2. Why did you choose to be gay?
It's really not a choice, my friend. These are the cards I was dealt with. Did you ever have to choose to be straight?
3. Have you ever tried dating a woman? If not, how sure are you that you are gay?
As a matter of fact, I have dated several women. So I know the distinction. Now assuming I have not dated women before, I'm pretty sure I would still know that men turn me on. Oh wait, let me ask you the same question: have you ever tried dating someone of the same sex? Maybe you should try it, just so you're sure about your sexuality.
4. Do you want to be a girl?
I am happy to have a penis, thank you very much. And please, don't call me "girl" or invite me to a "girls' night out." I am very happy with how I look and with my physiological features. Read up on "LGBTQ" and try to understand the differences.
5. Is there a chance that this is just a phase?
Everything is possible in this world. Maybe you should try having sex with someone of the same sex, and see if your being straight is also a "just a phase."
 |
| image courtesy of cheezburger.com |
Thanks for the "compliment," but if you think all gay guys look the same (or have the same "vibe") then you are sadly mistaken. Just because I like men doesn't mean that I need to act like a girl. My sexual orientation does not reflect how I want to present myself to others. I act the way that makes me the most comfortable.
7. Aren't you scared of getting HIV?
Last I heard, the HIV virus needs to be transmitted sexually (or via blood transfusion, if you want to be more inclusive). I won't get it for simply being gay. And guess what? We have about the same chances of getting the virus so maybe you should start worrying about who you're sleeping with.
8. So who else in our circle is gay?
I'm flattered that you think I have an excellent gaydar, dear. But let me set something straight. Just because I came out to you doesn't mean that I have the right to "out" everybody else. It's not my decision, and I refuse to be an asshole.
 |
| image courtesy of washington.edu |
So there you have it, straight guys and girls. These are some of the questions that you probably shouldn't ask a gay guy. If you do, you might get similar responses as mine (if you ask a really nice gay guy). And if you happen to encounter a really bitchy gay guy, you will probably get more interesting responses. And possibly a bitch slap or two.
RELATED POSTS:
7 Things you should stop saying on Grindr
Dating a Bisexual: 6 Things You Should Know
8 Signs that a guy is hitting on you
No comments:
Post a Comment