image courtesy of musedmagonline
I was still hung over about this whole sex tape issue, so I just decided to send out a shout out to ask this ever relevant question:
Would you ever consider making a sex video or not? Why or why not? Alone or with a partner? What would make you want to do this? What will you do with the video?
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| Comments from respondents who do not want to make a sex tape. |
"I had a bad experience with it"
I got a really interesting response that merits its own blog entry. It’s about his actual experience with having a viral sex video. He started with these words:
“It can make you or break you. I had a video with my partner way back and it somehow went viral on this porn site. Back then I was in college and didn’t bother thinking any consequences of making that video. Now, I’m not considering making another one.”
***Oberyn, 27***
I was intrigued and I was curious. And I wanted to find out more. So I asked a couple of follow up questions. I am amazed at how casual the conversation went; anonimity does have its perks.
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| Privacy is important to a lot of gay guys. |
"I loved him and i trusted him"
It started as something that he and his boyfriend wanted to try out. He was in college then, and his partner was 4 years older than him. They agreed that the video should be kept private and between the two of them. It was exciting and it was cool and they both enjoyed making it.
Fast forward to when one of his friends approached him to say that his video has been posted online. It was clear enough and impossible to deny. To make things worse, some irresponsible members of the campus gay community helped spread it around. It was not a good time for him. He confronted his partner and they ended up breaking up. Up until this day, he has no idea who posted the video. All he knows is that the copy leaked from is boyfriend.
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| Some people live a risky life. |
Waiting for the storm to pass
A few months later, the issue died down after newer and more daring posts emerged. I asked him how he handled the situation. If something like this happened to me, I have no idea what I would do. He said that he just kept his mouth shut throughout the ordeal. He believed that saying something, anything, would just lead to other issues. He thought that it was better not to say anything and to just wait for the storm to pass.
He also had great support from his closest friends. Without judgment, they did their part by not spreading the links and helping to keep rumors at bay. It was not a good time for him but he somehow found the courage to push through and overcome the obstacles.
On regrets and moving on
When this all started, Oberyn did not really think about the consequences of making a sex tape. He trusted the person he was dating, and didn't think that there was too much to lose. To a certain extent, he was even cocky about making the video. Regret, as it turns out, bites you in the ass at the end. His sexual preference came out of the open involuntarily. He became the talk of the town. He was pushed into a situation that wasn't exactly preferable to him.
But he tried to move on.
You can never really leave something like this behind. He thinks that the website has already been shut down, and that his video is lost in oblivion. He does, however, think about the experience from time to time. There is always a dark shadow hovering behind him, of a possibility that this nightmare will somehow come back when he least expects it.
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